This essay aired on radio station WVTF. I had breast cancer. Sort of. Depending on who you’re talking to Ductal Carcinoma In Situ (DCIS for those speaking English) is called either pre-disease or stage zero
Category: essays
This essay originally appeared in The Hook. How did certain topics go from utterly unmentionable to uttered incessantly? Impotence, constipation, poorly endowed men, and comfortable tampons are not only out of the closet, they’re agitating
This essay originally appeared in The Hook. Caller I.D has revolutionized telephone etiquette. A helpful (though guilt-laded innovation) for the callee, the invention is potentially devastating for the caller. And not just tele-marketers. We’re all
This essay originally appeared in The Hook. I was perusing the obituaries over coffee the other morning, looking for the odd limerick or letter addressed to the deceased. I do this often. It gives me
Ah, springtime. Forget robins. The true harbingers of spring in Charlottesville are the clusters of distressed families on The Lawn of the University of Virginia. They are enduring The College Visit. Potty training and driving
This essay aired on radio station WMRA. Like a deranged dietician I put a jar of Ragu Meat Sauce in a box for one family and save the small can of Vienna Sausages for the
This essay originally appeared on Salon.com. I’m on their list. It doesn’t matter where I am, sooner or later my name comes up, the dispatcher checks my location and they arrive, frequently with suitcases in
This essay originally appeared in The Hook. My 48-year-old doctor-spouse chalks up the pain in his shoulder to post-golf muscle strain and blames his indigestion on the 19th hole chili-dog. As both complaints are side-effects